Everyday I’m writing to get my day started. I’ve got great prompts from this site:
Today’s question is…
“What areas of your life do you blame others for? Or society? The economy? Your genes? How can you take responsibility for the situation they threw you into?”
I don’t know if I can blame others that much for my situation.
Most of all, I wish I had a guidance counselor to say, “If you want to do ____, you need to do _____.” I didn’t have a clue and still seem to be absolutely clueless.
I wish I could have had somebody to show me the way. “You want to be a successful writer, this is what you need to do ______.” I also wish somebody scared me enough not to major in English or want to become a writer — I probably wouldn’t have listened. At least I may have a chance to carry on with a degree that’s nearly completely worthless.
My parents and friends have always been mostly supportive.
For the most part, all of my former employers have been good to me — except for Real Estate New York and The Brickhouse.
Real Estate New York is a magazine in NYC that laid me off after I broke my neck. I tried to sue them, but they’re also owned by American Lawyer Media and they basically said, “Try us.” So once my little grace period wore off, I needed to pay for my own health insurance. In case you didn’t know, that’s not cheap.
I barely made any money working at the bar: The Brickhouse. That’s not the problem. The problem is that I had a seizure while working. They called an ambulance that I did not want. They saddled me with the bill. Again, health insurance stuff isn’t cheap. They’re owned by Four Corners Taverns in Chicago.
I am so sick of applying for jobs. That can be society’s and the economy’s fault. The economy sucks, so everybody is applying for the few jobs that are out there.
Society has a much bigger part in this. Everything is done online, which is fine. Job applying has probably never been easier. But it’s also probably never been as difficult in a few ways.
I’ve applied to hundreds of jobs and have heard back from maybe 20. I have no idea if the guy looking at my job applications is even looking at them. I am so tired of telling people my race, sex, veteran status and disability status. This is a job interview, not a dating service.
Maybe prospective employers are looking up some stuff that is completely unrelated to my employment records. Should I be passed over because I used to write jokes about getting drunk and faltering with relationships? I have some photos of me drinking beer, should that disqualify me from teaching a class on public speaking?
My genes? I think the only think I can blame my parents for is making me incredibly uncoordinated. I don’t know if this was a nurture or nature kind of thing, but I would like to be nimble, quick and spry in my next life.
I do my best to take responsibility for as much as possible. I don’t know if the older generations know how difficult it is to find a decent job these days. I literally spend hours a day applying and researching. I feel like if the boss doesn’t like my look or tone of voice, goodbye. And that’s all up to them, but geez it is frustrating.